R & R for the Weary Soul & my symptoms

This weekend was the weekend that Larry planned to take Mark and Brian to SLC for the UW and BYU games. He left Thursday afternoon, so I left too!

I went out to my sister, Pam's Palm Springs home and we had a blast just pampering ourselves. We really splurged, getting yogurt at 9:30 pm and then getting a foot reflexology foot massage after that!

She took me to see "Celtic Woman'' in concert at Aqua Calentie? We got fully body massages and went to a Lobster Fest at her Club. It was all you could eat, and we ate!

We also had amazing breakfasts each morning at their club where for $5 you could get Lox and bagels or Eggs Benedict or Waffles or Steak and Eggs and everything was delicious.

We watched 3 movies at different times: The Blind Side and 2 Legally Blond movies.

I had a great time with my sissy. It was just what I needed after the roller coaster I've been on.

It's hard to come 'back' to life when you have resigned yourself to dying in the next 2 years. So, I don't have ALS, then what is it? Here are my symptoms..... There are 3 of them:
1. Loosing my hair (and I mean loosing lots of it, even my hairdresser said something)
2. Lose of strength in my left hand and arm.
3. My voice comes and goes with slurring of speech.
4. Fatigue

The really odd thing is that my fingernails are stronger than they have ever been in my life!

And I noticed that people were a lot nicer to me when they thought I was going to die. Why is that?

I'm the Mystery Woman

OK, bottom line, I'm not going to die anytime soon from ALS because I don't have it!

I don't have any of the Neurological diseases! They can't tell me what I have, so they took 5 more viles of blood in order to try to find out.

On our first visit the Dr. said that I EITHER had ALS or XCXCXCXCZZZZZ. Because of my family history of ALS running in my family, we all assumed it was ALS because it started with me in the left thumb, just like my Aunt Peggy who died of ALS.

The one thing this month has taught me is to take one day at a time and to enjoy the journey. I need to start taking care of myself before I spread myself so thin in trying to serve everyone else. I also discovered true friendship and love with the ones I care about the most, my friends who cried when I told them the good news and some of my family who were elated at my good fortune.

Was it the Priesthood Blessing I received at the hands of righteous men? Or, was it the heartfelt prayers of so many righteous people? Or was it that my name was in at least 3 Temples? Whateer it was, I'm Thankful that Heavenly Father has given me a second chance.

Another clearer update on Health

So many people read the worst in my last blog that I have to set the record straight.

Remember I said it was one of 2 things? It could just be some sort of Auto immune disease thing going on that is attacking my nerves, but until we get a blood test taken (Tomorrow), and then it takes about a week for the results to come back, we don't know if I have this immune thing or ALS. Think positive.

I want everyone to know how peaceful I feel now. I can honestly feel 'angels' attending me and surrounding me. And, no, I'm not crazy. They are bringing me peace that transcendes anything earthly and I am thankful for that. I don't want to cry anymore, I truly am calm.

Here is how each morning goes: I wake up and take stock to see what works and what doesn't. Then I read my scriptures, take a walk, a shower and on with the rest of the day. I am doing very well now and things aren't getting worse yet. I can still type and I have a fair amount of strength in my left hand/arm. My legs are stong with no signs of weakness. It's my speach that worries most people, but hey, everyone should be happy that I can't force my own ideas on them anymore.

You will hear me joke about this now, so be advised. If I make slide remarks and poke fun at mortality, don't think I am being insensitive. If I can laught, then I can't cry. Simple. I hope this helps you all understand where I am at this time. When I get another update I will post it but for now, put me in your prayers and on the Temple Prayer Rolls.

Happy Independence Day

My heart gets really tender when I think about this great land of ours. About all the great men who suffered and bled and sacrificed to bring about the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence.

I am a genealogist, to no one's surprise, I have traced the ethnicity of our family. Starting from as far back as I can go, we hail from Italy, France, England, Germany, Ireland and Wales. All together we are AMERICANS. This great Country doesn't discriminate against people who don't yet feel like they belong here, people do. If you are an American Citizen, just say so! I am an American! If you are inferior then go right ahead and say "I am an African-American" or "I am a Mexican-American" or "I am a Chinese-American" or whatever country you still identify with, but if you live in America or were born in America, you are an American! Pure and simple.

There should be no distinction of our nationalities, we are AMERICANS! God Bless this great land of ours. We do not yet have the perfect union (Country), but we don't have any perfect people yet either. Lets all work on ourselves to make ourselves more perfect in order to make our Great Country more perfect.

That usually means: Be kinder, be loving, be peaceful, be generous, and be honest in all your doings. May God bless our Land.

Old Tried and True Friends

Throughout my life I have been blessed with some true friends. You know the kind: The ones you have fun with, cry with and just think will always be there and then you loose track of each other. But when you find each other again, it's just like no time has passed at all.

This week I heard from 2 of those old friends which made my week really sweet. The first person I heard from was Janet Howes, I met Janet in about 1978. I always admired her for having so many kids and still keeping it all together. Her kids grew up with my kids and were best friends for many years. We left Torrance within a month of each other. She moved to Las Vegas and I never knew it until one day I went to call her and the phone was dead. UGH. Until she called me I had no way of getting in touch with her and I'm sure glad she did.

The other friend is really "My Best Friend" for life. I have known Jenny Leticia Arellano De La Torre Fernandez for 54 years. That's right I met her when I was 4 years old. She knew me through all the crazy stages a kid goes through. She also experienced the verbal abuse Gloria was so good at handing out and through it all Jenny loved me. We've seen each other Fat and skinny. We were at each other's weddings. I was the only white girl in hers and she was the only Mexican in mine. What a team we were. She used to protect me against the black girls that always tried to gang up on me. She tried to make me stop cussing, which I know have, but I didn't then and she used to punch me in the arm each time I said a bad word. Anyway, she found me on Face book and I'm so glad she did. She had 3 of the sweetest kids you would ever want to know, I hope they still are. We are going to get together in a few weeks and have lunch and I'm looking forward to it.

Can I do anything right?

Linda and Denny, Larry's sister and husband are here for the Rose Parade. They came in yesterday and the Bishop sent me with a hand drawn map to the Long Beach Airport to pick them up. It was dark. So, I drove there OK and picked them up on time, but coming home was a nightmare, attimately it was my fault. There were no directions on the map as to N or S or E or W. So, when we went back to get on the freeway, I didn't know which way to take, so Linda suggested we go North. (it was the wrong way) and we ended up in Torrance on Artesia Blvd. I finally got on the 91, took the carpool lane and made it to the 57 N. However, I wasn't paying attention, and passed Lambert exit, so I went on to Diamond Bar Blvd, where I turned around. Bottom line, I can't drive well.
Larry criticizes me when I drive too.
Today he criticized how I park.
He told me to get him a sign for his door, and he wasn't very nice at telling me he doesn't like what I made for him. I didn't save the receipt from Sears so he could see how much I paid for his clothes, so when he took them back with the gift receipts, they gave him a lousy time and he ended up paying some. I screw up names on signs. I pass gas at the wrong time. Then I get an email from my oldest son telling me that I am scaring his kids by telling them about the state of our Country. Well, I'm passionate too, and right about now I'm so passionate that I'm about to throw up with all the criticism coming my way. Just everybody back off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Merry Christmas 2009

Merry Christmas Everyone! Here is the Bishop and I on Christmas morning waiting at the top of the stairs just like we always made the kids do. It was fun. I don't think I have ever grown up when it comes to Christmas. I love decorating, giving gifts, receiving gifts, the lights, the busy stores, the cars looking at our lights, walking and being amazed that our neighborhood goes all out every year. Christmas time makes me feel ALIVE and I love that feeling, when it seems the world is right for just a little while. I keep a positive attitude during this time of year, and it never seems to get me down.

My take on General Conference

Wow! What a great two days of being uplifted. I hope everyone who could, listed to Conference, or at least videoed it so you can listed to it later.

I can't think of any one thing that I felt, except that God really does love me and knows me, I believe that He accepts me for all my faults and that if I keep trying to improve myslef, He will make me better than I could be by myself. So, I will keep trying.

They talked a lot about love, anger and repentence. I wonder if they were talking about me??? After a a little refelection, I believe they were.

"itis" - ugh

I can't explain how tired I am of 'growing'. I know that there is "opposites in all things", but give me a break!

Here I am trying to get myself healthy and in shape and the first problem that cropped up was a severe pain in my left hip. It was so bad, I couldn't walk. I found out I had Bursitis. A shot of cortisone fixed that problem.

I was good to go for about 2 weeks.

Then I started with the same pain in my right hip. I went into the Dr. before our Hawaii vacation and got another cortisone shot.

It didn't work, so the problem has been getting worse as time goes on. I'm fine AFTER I get up and walking. But, after I sit or lay for more than 15 minutes, I'm back to being crippled when I get up. Now the pain goes from my sciatic nerve to my ankle, right down my right side.

So, I go back to the Dr. And now I get to have an MRI, because he is pretty sure I have arthuritis in my right hip which is pinching a nerve. So between Bursitis and Arthuritis, I'm an 'itis' mess.

Bottom line, don't get old.

B M I

That's Body Mass Index in case your wondering. I really do have a new lifestyle and it's paying off in more ways than one.

When I started this (about 4 or 5 weeks ago), all I knew was that I HAD to get my body healthier, which in turn would make me happier, not that I was unhappy with how I looked, because I wasn't, it was because of how I FELT! I had aches and pains I have never had before (bursitis), I couldn't bend or contort like I used to without pulling a muscle so bad I had to be in bed for days. I couldn't open jars or cans or lift water bottles anymore! I could see that I was going to be in a wheelchair before I turned 60 if I didn't do something about it. So, the first thing I did was go to the Lord in fervent prayer about my concerns. Then I went to bed.

The next morning I woke up with EXAXTLY what I had to do. I had to start walking again, with weights. AND I needed to find someone who could help me understand HOW to exercise and stretch properly. So, I went for my first walk (in 3 months, my normal walk is fast but only lasted 1/2 hour on Monday, Wednesday & Friday- unless I had something else better to do). While I was out walking I saw a sign in the Liquor store parking lot saying "Personal Trainer, call for a free evaluation XXX-XXX-XXXX" So I called and went in for an evaluation. I met Dave Gibson at that time. He is the nicest guy, and so knowledgeable. He charges $65.00 per session and he sells either 10 or 20 sessions. Well, I KNEW I had to do this. I went home and talked to Larry and he reluctantly agreed that I could buy 10 sessions (AND THAD WAS ALL 'WE CAN'T AFFORD IT" I started working out at Athletic Unlimited with Dave Gibson, and he is only a half a block away from my house.

When I started, I had a print out of: (this is embarrasing) On 10 Aug 2009
Body Type: Standard
Gender: Female
Age: 57
Height: 5 ft. 2 in
Weight: 149.1 lbs
BMI: 27.3
Fat %: 38.9
BMR: 5558 kj
1329 k cal
Impedance: 577
Fat Mass: 58.0 lbs
FFM: 91.o1 lbs
TBW: 66.61 lbs
Desirable range Fat %: 23-24%

Today I had the same weigh in and here are the results:

Body Type: Standard
Gender: Female
Age: 57
Height: 5 ft. 2 in
Weight: 144.61 lbs
BMI: 26.4
Fat %: 36.9
BMR: 5478 kj
1309 k cal
Impedance: 560
Fat Mass: 53.41.0 lbs
FFM: 91.21 lbs
TBW: 66.81 lbs
Desirable range Fat %: 23-24%

I am convinced that eating correctly is the key to my getting healthier and building more lean body muscle which in turns burns more calories even as your sleeping. Dave insisted that I purchase a book called "The Clean Eating Diet" by Tosca Reno. This book is EXACTLY what the 89th section of the D & C is all about, in an easy to follow way for lamebrains such as me and dad.

Well, today was my last day officially training with Dave, but Dad has taken my place and is going to purchase 10 sessions. Dad has been walking on his own for about 2 weeks now and eating clean with me. We both are feeling much better and stronger and have a clearer mind. My ability to multi-task is slowly coming back. I also don't have to take excedrin in the morning to wake up! I wake up on my own about 6:30 am and I am anxious to go walking which has turned out to be 6 days a week for 1 hour each day. I even climb up Wildcat way during my walk. By the way, don't anyone in my family go and purchase the clean eating book, you are all getting it for Christmas!

On the Go again

Well as you can see, we did Knotts Berry Farm with Lisa, John, Caleb, Davis and Beckham! We also had a sort of Family Reunion for Ashlynn Marie Rober's Baptism Day, it was wonderful

Sometime during the Weekend Grandpa found time to wrestle with all the boys!

And then we got to take them all to the park, where we had a grand time!

Just in case you haven't been informed, Caroline (Me) now has a personal trainer and is using a book called the "Eating Clean Diet". I have lost 2 pounds and 2% body fat! I use weights when I walk and I am feeling better than I did at 30!

Now Larry and I are on our way to Maui, so see you all later!

Lost in the Redwoods

Today we hiked through Jedidiah Smith National Park. We did really well for old foggys, but at one point I asked Larry, "Where are we, are we lost?", he answered without even a lost beat saying, "were not lost, I just don't know where we are yet". That is a classic! We had a great time!

It was an interesting de ja vu without kids to constantly be guiding throught the woods, answering questions an saying "come on Mark, keep up honey".

My New Recorder & my pretty blog

Well, after the Priesthood Blessing, I haven't had a nightmare since. Anyone with nightmares or nigh terrors should get a Priesthood Blessing, it works!

Brian and Kate gave me an Ipod recording devise that works with my Ipod and it is truly amazing and wonderful! It was the easiest device I have ever used. I am having fun with it and I will soo learn how to add audio to my blog, then watch out! Thank you so much Brian and Kate for the wonderful little devise! I am thinking of a million ways to use it too! Now I have to go have some fun with it. It's a perfect little birthday and mother's day give. Thank you, Thank you. And while I'm at it, Thank you to Lisa for making my blog look descent and interesting. I don't think I would blog if she didn't get my hind end out of a few pickles. She truly saves my sanity when it comes to blog sense.

A happy house full of rug rats

Our kids have been arriving today. It is so fun to see the cousins interact with each other and the daughter & daughters-in-law talk so much about every subject under the sun!

The kids dyed hard boiled eggs and are pretty excited for the Easter egg hund in the morning. I think I'm just as excited!

Today, the kids swam in the Jacuzzi, but Ashlynn, Briggs and Caleb, didn't stay in it, they went straight for the cold pool and swam for 5 hours! They were prunes when they got out for supper.

I fixed my famous 'Mac & Cheese', cole slaw and steamed baby carrots. It was a pretty good dinner, even if I say so myslef.

My firstborn Child

This is Brians High School Graduation photo!

This is my son Brian at his birth. Today is his birthday and I am very aware of how blessed I have been for the last 33 years. There is something about your first child, I think it is because you have no one else to take your attention away from them. You remember a lot more.

Brian at 3 months

Ever since Brian was born, he seemed like the perfect child. Always alert, happy and communicative. He said his first word at 9 months "Twee" as he pointed to the Christmas tree that was in Dr. Gurfield's (our peditrition's) office.
Brian at 9 months
Once he started saying words he never stopped, and by 18 months he was a full on conversationalist and could communicate effectively. At 2 years almost 3 years we came home from Church one Sunday, where he was in the Nursery (with me because he wouldn't leave my side- even when I went to the bathroom!)

He got very serious and started telling me the story of the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ! He laid it out in a very logical manner and told me that Jesus had died for our sins! He was very animated and his big brown eyes were very serious with the telling of that story, as if I didn't really understand what it meant to me. It was the most touching moment of my existance to hear that story from the mouth of a babe!

Well, from that moment on, no one could tell me that he wasn't the most wonderful child Heavenly Father had sent down to earth in a very long time. I loved my son unconditionally then and still do today. He has grown up into a fine man, a good husband and I hope an effective father! (That remains to be seen)

Brian in Kindergarten

My Husband

Today was a very busy and stressful day for me. In fact the week has been that way. In fact the month has been that way.

Tonight I noticed my husband, Larry. Not that I don't notice him every day, but today it was very apparent to me how much he supports me and helps me.

I ran out of the house this morning to go to Mission Veijo to give a lecture. I had spent days turning my 'old' overhead transparencies into power point. Larry did the wash for us, 4 or 5 loads and he hung up all the items that needed hanging. All he asked me to do was to separate it for him before I left.

Then I came home exhausted and took a nap. Larry went out to check out the hotel for Mark and Lisa to stay in when they come for Easter and the Blessing. He also went to the store for some specials he saw in the newspaper.

I got up and went into the computer to learn a new program to help my client who is coming here tomorrow to record her parents. Larry reminded me to download the program Mark had told me to download, "Audacity". While I stewed and read and tried and failed to make the program work, in other words while I learned how to use the program, Larry cooked a delicious dinner. Larry also did the shopping and has done the meal planning.

While I ran out of the house after dinner to go to a Stake Primary Training meeting, Larry cleaned up the dishes and juiced Lemonade for me so I could offer it to my clients tomorrow.

During the day, he stopped me several times to just give me a hug with words of encouragement.

This is indicative of Larry's love for me and I feel like the luckiest woman alive to have him for my eternal companion.

I seem to have days like this a lot lately. God Bless Larry for all his meal planning and shopping and cooking and washing and cleaning and vacuuming. I couldn't do today what I do without him. In fact I might just starve to death, because meal planning, shopping & cooking are way down on my list of likes and necessities.

He also took time to blog and work on his own business and the house budget.

All in all, I am one blessed woman. I love you Larry.

This is serious, I'm being stalked!

It seems like it was about 6-7 years ago, when a black man walked into our Sacrament meeting and sat alone. I felt sorry for anyone new in the ward to look so out of place and friendless.

That first Sunday, I plopped myself and my family down next to him and proceeded to be friendly. That day they were giving talks on the Articles of Faith. So, like a good member-missionary, I took out my Articles of Faith card from my scripture case and gave it to him.

It seems now that he has taken the "light of Christ" I try to exhibit and turned it into something ugly!

Everywhere I go, the Family History Center, Church, Store, I see him there and staring at me. He makes excuses to talk to me, send me notes and love letters and I thought I put a stop to it a few years ago by talking to the Stake President, Bishop and my husband. They all had talks with him and it seemed to get better for a while, but now he is worse than ever!

He was asked to change shifts at the ORFHC so we wouldn't run into each other. He refused saying "I won't change shifts and that's final. I want to give Caroline another chance!" The person who called him was flabbergasted!

Now Beth McCarty is going to tell him not to come back to the ORFHC- ever. We don't need him to volunteer if all he wants to do is bother me! I have told him off, insulted him, talked to him, ignored him and walked away from him when he was trying to talk to me.

Last Sunday, I went to Church late because I was just tired (we meet at 9:00 am), I just missed Sacrament, and went directly to the Primary room, and received my class while they were coming in. He had the audacity to peek through the glass partition in the door of my classroom to see if I was there! That is the last straw! I want that man to stay as far away from me as possible. In fact I hope he gets into some accident and can never walk again! This is a living hell for me and I won't go to Church or the ORFHC anymore if that man shows up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!